Fear of Losing

The Simple Newsletter - Issue # 094

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Tom’s Thoughts

There’s a pattern I’ve been noticing lately.

And it keeps showing up in conversations with our clients.

The fear of losing people.

Not just any people.

The people they believe their business depends on.

Employees.

Clients.

The people who help keep the business running.

And I get it.

When you’ve spent years building something, the thought of losing the people who support it can be unsettling.

But here’s what I’ve noticed.

Sometimes the fear of losing someone causes more problems than actually losing them.

Think about it.

How many business owners hold on to employees they know aren't the right fit?

Not because the employee is doing a great job.

But because they dread what comes next.

The job posting.

The endless resumes.

The interviews.

The uncertainty of whether the next person will be any better.

The time it takes to train someone new.

And the disruption to everything else they're trying to accomplish.

So they hold on.

They tolerate things they shouldn't.

They make accommodations they wouldn't normally make.

And they convince themselves that keeping the person is easier than replacing them.

But is it?

Now let's look at the other side.

Clients.

Especially in service businesses.

I see owners bending over backward to keep clients who may no longer be the right fit.

Taking on extra work.

Making exceptions.

Saying yes when they really want to say no.

Allowing boundaries to be crossed.

All because they're afraid of losing the business.

And what happens?

They become overwhelmed.

They get stressed.

They start resenting the very people they're working so hard to keep.

And before they know it, they're spending more time managing the relationship than actually doing the work.

They're making decisions based on what they're afraid to lose instead of what they're trying to build.

Here's the thing.

Employees will come and go.

Clients will come and go.

No one is forever.

And that's not necessarily a bad thing.

Sometimes losing someone is exactly what creates the space for something better.

A better employee.

A better client.

A better opportunity.

A better business.

But it's hard to see that when you're standing on the side of what you might lose.

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Tom’s Lessons

Here's what I find fascinating.

When I ask business owners to look back at the times they lost an employee or a client they were terrified to lose, something interesting happens.

They often tell me that things actually got better.

They hired someone who was a better fit.

They found clients who valued their work.

They improved their systems.

They created new processes.

They started setting boundaries they should have established years ago.

And sometimes they realized just how much stress that relationship had been creating.

But there was one thing they all had to do first.

They had to walk through the fear of losing.

And here's where I want to challenge the way we think about that fear.

What if what we're really afraid of isn't the loss itself?

What if we're simply afraid of the inconvenience that comes with it?

Because when you really break it down, that's often what it is.

It's inconvenient to hire someone new.

It's a nuisance to interview candidates.

It's stressful to replace lost revenue.

It's frustrating to retrain someone.

It's uncomfortable to have difficult conversations.

But those things aren't permanent.

They're temporary.

They're seasons.

And sometimes we make decisions to avoid a temporary inconvenience that create long-term problems.

Read that again.

We make decisions to avoid a temporary inconvenience that create long-term problems.

We keep the wrong employee and continue carrying their workload.

We keep the wrong client and continue sacrificing our boundaries.

We avoid the short-term discomfort only to create ongoing stress.

And then we wonder why we're exhausted.

Here's something else I've learned.

This cycle doesn't end.

As long as you own a business, people will come and go.

You'll hire.

You'll lose employees.

You'll gain clients.

You'll lose clients.

You'll make great decisions.

And you'll make some terrible ones.

That's business.

The cycle never ends. So don't let it end you.

Instead of treating every departure like a crisis, start seeing it as part of the process.

Because seasons of loss can also be seasons of opportunity.

An opportunity to reassess.

An opportunity to reevaluate.

An opportunity to make changes you may have been avoiding.

And eventually, an opportunity to reap the benefits of those decisions.

That doesn't mean every loss is good or that every transition will be easy.

It means you don't have to let the fear of what might happen dictate what you know needs to happen.

The next time you're afraid of losing an employee or a client, ask yourself:

Am I holding on because this relationship is right for my business, or because I'm afraid of the inconvenience of letting go?

Because there's a big difference.

And that difference may be exactly what's keeping your business from moving forward

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So here's my question for you this week:

When was the last time you held on to an employee, a client, or even a business relationship longer than you should have because you were afraid of what would happen if you let go?

And looking back, what happened when you finally did?

Reply and tell me. While I can't respond to every message, Adam and I read every reply, and we genuinely appreciate hearing from you.

That's all for this week.

See you next Saturday.