craving solitude

Adam T. Hurd
Jun 28
2 min read

THE SIMPLE NEWSLETTER - ISSUE #026

In this issue, I explore a surprising realization: the deep longing not for more connection or accomplishment—but for true solitude. I challenge you to examine the value we place on unstructured time and whether it’s a genuine need or a clever form of self-deception. Through introspection and the search for outside perspective, I invite you to rethink how clarity is truly found.

ADAM'S THOUGHTS:

Is it strange to realize that what you really want is more time to yourself? Not more time with your family, not more time to grow your business, not more time for fitness, travel, or extraordinary experiences—but just time, alone, for you.

The reason I don’t crave more time for any of those other things is simple—I have them all now. But what’s missing is something quieter. The moments I do have to myself are often consumed by worry about others, or spent recharging so I can show up for them. Sure, I carve out space for hobbies, workouts, and enjoying life’s wonders, but I rarely allow myself truly unstructured, serendipitous time. And maybe that’s what I’m longing for most.

Still, I wonder, why do I want this so much? Why does it feel so important, or why have I convinced myself it is?

ADAM'S LESSON:

I’ve started asking myself if this space I crave is truly as valuable as I make it out to be. Have I convinced myself that when I allow time for random musings or inspiration, greatness must follow? Or is that just a way to justify distraction?

Here’s what I’ve learned so far: we, as humans, are incredible at convincing ourselves we’re right. We work hard to find evidence that supports what we’ve already decided is true. It’s confirmation bias. And because of this, it’s hard to know if you’re onto something real or just full of it.

But here’s the catch—you likely can’t figure out the answer alone. You need perspectives from the outside. Someone who isn’t tangled up in your emotions or directly affected by your decisions. Someone who has your back but can also call you out with honesty.

I know some people find this clarity in books or other content. You sit and absorb the words of Nietzsche, Marcus Aurelius, or maybe your favorite modern thinker like Alex Hormozi or Gary Vaynerchuk. But books and content are one-way streets. You can’t volley ideas back and forth. True clarity often comes through a real conversation, with a real person, playing a mental game of thought tennis.